Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
It's just like the Real World with babies
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
