You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Randomize
