pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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