she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I just googled if crying burns calories
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
