You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
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