I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
