i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
