They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
