I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
So much Jack, so little girl.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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