This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
