I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
