Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize