Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize