Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
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