I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize
