fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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