I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
