And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Randomize
