Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
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