I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
