Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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