Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I deserve this hangover.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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