found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm sobbing to NWA
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize