no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
be right there i have to get my cape
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize