If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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