weddingsv make me drug and hornr
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize