belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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