I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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