is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
