i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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