she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i permit you to call me
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize