he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I just want nice things and good sex
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
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