what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
