I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
