he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
