like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize