she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Houston, we have a blender
Found your dick twin last night
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
