About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
