I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
The power of my boobs compel you
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
