Say something about gay babies.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
