new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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