What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
