didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
