I think i peed on brittanys purse
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
