I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
