with your own penis?
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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