Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize