I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
