My brain says no but my pants say off.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
