Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
